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This week, Christina writes the GameGirls about her father's demands that she must drop her video game habits and donate her consoles and game collection. Britini, FemmeFatale, and Miz_Calamity offer their advice on how to remedy this situation and convince daddy that games aren't just for pimple-faced males anymore.

Hey GameGirls,
I really hope you girls can help me out with advice... I don't have a lot of friends. Like, I really only have one friend and she lives an hour away which makes hanging out with her hard. One of the main things I do for fun is play video games, mostly RPGs since I don't have anyone to play with. The other day my Dad told me that he wants me to "get rid of all my video game junk." He is threatening to donate my games and consoles too if I don't get rid of it. And I'm starting to literally freak out. He thinks it's making me less social, but it totally doesn't in any way. I was shy before I even got my first console, a PS2 which I've only had for 2 years. So what should I do? How do I convince him that it's not hurting my life? He is threatening to make me get rid of it. He's been taking the whole "video games are not for girls" approach.

Thank you so much GameGirls
-Christina

FemmeFatale's Response:
I've been through this before. I can't tell you how many times my mom has disconnected my internet on me during a raid. We've gotten into terrible fights over my long gaming hours. I just sort of ignored her, no matter how much she threatened to get rid of the internet completely, she never had the heart to...There was a time when I was playing WAY too much though, and I didn't want to hang out with anyone and made excuses to my friends on why I wanted to stay in for the day. Eventually I realized that I didn't want to live my life that way and cut down my game time a bit. I rarely pass an offer to go out with friends now, but I still have plenty of gaming time.

I'm trying to think of how you can lose the dad aggro. Maybe look for a few multiplayer games you think your dad would enjoy playing with you. Show him that gaming is really fun, and how easily you can kick his butt, so you can tell him "If vids weren't for girls, then how come I just 0wned you!!"

Or you can compromise with him. Perhaps figure out together a reasonable amount of hours a day you can put towards playing your PS2, maybe have a Friday game night with your dad if you do find some games he enjoys playing with you.

Your daddy is just worried about you, remember our parents come from.

Miz_Calamity's Response:
I think almost everyone goes through this phase with their parents--especially gamers. I went through this about 2 years ago with my parents--mind you I have been gaming since I was 5 years old. They wanted me to go out more and be more social with people and they thought video games were just completely taking over my life.

One night I got tired of it and I just sat down with them and talked about why they hated me playing video games so much. So after listening to their side of the story I showed them all the things that I have accomplished with video games. I have 100+ friends in the online gaming community that I know by name (not just by their GamerTag) who live all around the world, I compete in tournaments where I actually get to meet quite a few of these people and hang out just as if they lived right next door. I even have pictures of them on my Myspace! Just like Britini, I told them that I could be just like every other person out there possibly doing drugs, getting pregnant, underage drinking (back then lol), but I was a good kid who just liked to stay at home playing video games, doing her homework, and working on her art. I think once he realizes that there are some good sides to gaming then he might lighten up.

But also remember you MUST at least try to make an effort to make friends outside of online gaming. You will be surprised how many friends you can make who are also into gaming just like you. So just make sure that you are showing your dad that you are making an effort to make some friends other than the one that you already have. And if all else fails show him our site!

Britini_Martini's Response:
I had a similar situation with my parents when I was living at home. My situation might have been a little bit more extreme because that's literally ALL I did for about 3-4 years straight, but it was kind of their fault. They moved out to the middle of nowhere, I couldn't afford gas, and all my friends lived too far away. Not to mention they were all potheads and drunks anyways, so I'd just chill at home playing games with my virtual friends all day long. Which was perfectly fine for me because not too many people understand the whole gaming community. Where I lived people found it "odd". I had SOOO much more in common with my gamer friends than I did with normal friends. All the "normal" people don't understand it and just laugh at the thought of me having more friends online in my Xbox than in real life.

What I did was ask my parents this: "Would you guys rather me be out partying? Getting high like EVERYONE else? Getting wasted everynight and driving around drunk? Or how bout getting pregnant? Would that be better?" Basically, video games are what kept me out of trouble all throughout high school. I guess you could say it was my anti-drug. (I should be in those commercials. I'm sure Jack Thompson would LOVE that.) Any parent that tells their kid to be "normal like everyone else" and get out more, obviously doesn't realize what normal is nowadays. If they knew, I'm sure they'd rather their kid be safe at home playing video games online with their friends.

I told my parents all this, and they finally realized that that's just what I love doing and there's nothing they can change about that. They also knew how much I Ioved competing and traveling the world. Who doesn't love traveling the world to play video games? If your parents want you to be a "normal" girl and be an un-original douche bag, then they need to realize that it's NOT abnormal anymore to be a female gamer. Girls love games just as much as guys do nowadays. Girls that don't like em, just haven;t tried them or at least haven't given them a chance. If they don't believe you, then show them our site. Also, just because you play video games, doesn't mean you're anti-social. You meet plenty of people and talk to tons of people online. Sure it's not in real life... but who gives a damn? You're still socializing in your own way.

Another thing I always pointed out, was the fact that they watch TV just as much as I play video games. The only difference in that is that I'm actually interacting with it, having fun, talking to people and zomg... SOCIALIZING! They would always say "Well... the games suck you in and you don't do anything else but play. Well, Video Games aren't just the only things that do that. My mom for example... whenever she gets a new book, you don't see her doing jack shit for days. You try talking to her and she's just completely gone. Basically, different things absorb different people. Everyone has different interests and ways of socializing. You choose video games to be your form of entertainment and way to socialize with people. They shouldn't rob you of what you enjoy.

Just try telling them calmly how you feel about it and how much enjoyment you get out of playing video games. Tell them that's it's just your way of having fun and entertaining yourself. No harm in that. Hopefully something from this helps you. :)

Got a question of your own for the GameGirls? Send an email to them at thegamegirls@gamepro.com. Your letter may appear in the next Ask the GameGirls!

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